Since I updated. But I really don't have anything to add.
Its still surreal, to know mom has been at the nursing home for over a year.
When I visit she's glad to see me, but after about 15-20 mins she asks me to leave.
It is beyond hard. Makes me not want to go. I don't go as often as I should.
Its JUST SO HARD.
She's in fairly good health though, participates in all the activities that she wants to, and seems to enjoy being around the people there. I guess that is something to be grateful for, even if its hard that she seems so different. She doesnt want to talk even on the phone anymore. Everyone says "at least she doesnt beg to come home" and I guess that is true, but it doesnt make it any easier that she seems to not want to be around me, either.
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