Update on placement

Mom is doing well at the nursing home.  We visited her Saturday - and it was the first time she said she wanted to go home. I reminded her that we can't keep her safe, and she said "oh yeah" and that was that.  The first Sunday she was there we took her to church - and found out how bad it really was there even.  My husband had to follow her the whole time, and she even tried to get on stage with the choir.  She is adament about joining the choir - so we decided at this time we shouldnt try to take her to church but maybe once a month.

Otherwise, she is doing well, enjoying the activities there the nurses say that she seems to be enjoying herself.  They still have her on wander alert, but they are letting her take walks with staff to the green house and around the campus.  Saturday the girls and I walked with her to a gazebo where we spent some time in the fresh air. She seemed to enjoy that. After about an hour though she's ready for us to go on and let her get back to writing.

Moving day

It was very anti-climatic.  She saw the sign for "whitfield" and nearly flipped, but once I said "you arent going to whitfield" she was fine - which even though she is, she isnt.  LOL "whitfield" is where they send 'crazy' people - and she isnt at the crazy people part.  So it wasnt total truth but in context of what she meant it was.

I really had very little to do - we moved her in, met the staff, they took us both on a tour.  I had to talk to the social worker and the doctor, and at about 11 mom was like "bye, you know where I am" LOL well, ok then.

It was hard, but I know its the right decision.  She seemed happier already - of course she claims to know everyone already.

I did have a moment with the doctor and nurses when I started crying - and this lady just arrived to visit her momma, and she gave me a big hug and told me that God knew everything, and that this was the best place - her mom has been their 3 years and staff is the same.  She also told me to visit as much as I could while mom knew me, b/c her mom doesnt know her anymore and she just wished she had come more.  Talk about God putting someone in the right place at the right time.

They are so NICE - everyone one of them you can tell is a calling.

God is good.... Thank you Jesus!

So, I had the talk with mom today.

I just told her the truth, that she needs 24 hour supervision and care, and we can't provide that.
I told her about the place, and - wait for it - she wants to go.  She's glad...said she was scared to be alone, but knew we couldnt do anything about it. PRAISE Jesus!

We are going shopping today to pick up a few new things, but she is ready, happy and relieved.

And so am I.

Thank you Lord - for your peace and guidance.

God's peace, right decisions - still hard.

Its been a long weekend.

I think I mentioned as soon as we got to the hospital to get her on Friday she asked if we were going to Alabama.  *sigh*

As soon as we got home, she was back to despondent.  It seems like she is so unhappy with us.  It makes me very sad, but there is nothing I can do about it.

She went to church with us today, and hubby got her to her Sunday school class, and then met her afterward, and got her to the sanctuary. Reports from her friends are that she was very happy and good.  I hate that she isn't happy around us.

Tomorrow I have to explain the move, and pack her up.

Everywhere I turn, God says "I've got this"  and I am very grateful, but that doesnt make it easy.  I know its the right decision, but that doesnt make it easy.

I pray for God's peace and direction, and His compassion to come through me when I have to tell her. That she will be peaceful and accepting, and not get agitated or upset, or try to leave.

Home from the hospital - for now

Hubby and I went to visit the nursing home we picked for her.  I as really impressed - the 'state hospital' had me worried, but it was amazing!  There are a lot of activities and fun things to do, including gardening, other out door activities, etc. I think once she gets settled in, she will be happy - its the transition that I'm worried about.

I really feel a peace about the place, its clean, the residents were happy. They were getting ready to go on an outing to the park (they have a park on campus). Its 350 acres, and really really pretty.  lots of grass, trees, a lake, a park etc.  All of the medical care she will need is there, from dental, eye, neurological etc.

After we finished the tour and saw the residence, I felt much better.  My only concern is getting her there now.

The hospital released her to me around noon, and as soon as she saw me, she asked if we were going to Alabama.  Oh boy.  :D  Could be a long 4 days!

Day 17 - discharge and admission

The social worker from the hospital called me today.  Mom is being discharged from geri-psych tomorrow.  Then she called right back and said that she would be admitted to the long term care facility on Tues of next week. 

I'm worried that progress we've made will be lost, and that she wont want to go on Tues.  I guess I'm just going to explain that the doctor wants her to have more 24 hour supervision and observation, and that she has to go to the other facility for that now. 

Please pray it goes smoothly. 

Day 16 in Geri Psych - treatment team meeting

Today we had our treatment team meeting at the Senior Care Unit.  Have I mentioned how nice the staff is?  They really are wonderful.  So kind, compassionate - for the whole family not just the patient.  They will never know how much I appreciate that.

Anyway, they told us that they have made some progress with mom - at least as much as can be expected.  They have her fairly stable, able to redirect her from some of her behaviors and have gotten her to a place where she is interacting and while it still takes her a long time to convey a thought, she is trying.

They have changed up her medicine and she seems to be responding to that.

The paperwork is moving along at the nursing home - however we were informed today that the Senior Care unit is pushing it with time, they really need her placed this week or they may have to discharge her home.  Im concerned with that, for two reasons: I dont want to lose any of the progress they have achieved for mom, and I am a chicken and want to blame the doctor for her placement.  If she comes home, I lose that argument, and I dont want it to be an issue when its time to move her.
The social worker seemed confident that it would happen this week, so maybe the doctor was just making sure we were informed.  I wasnt able to think of the "would that be ok for mom, would she lose her progress" question while I was in the room, it came to me later.  I plan to call back up there and talk to the social worker, plus I have left a message for admissions at Jaquith to see if they have experience with that.

I know its the right decision, and the team reaffirmed that placement is the right decision for her- but that doesnt make it easy.  Its still very hard, and it seems to me the path of least resistance would be transfer from the Unit to the home.

Please pray that if God wills it the pieces will fall into place this week.  I know He can.

Day 15 in Geri Psych

Update, day 15

mom has a BFF there - "crazy Mary" is what she calls her herself -
she's about Moms age.  She's new to the unit, as she put it "When
crazy Mary comes out, I know its time to come here"
I thought her name was Mary, but J reminded me this was crazy town,
and Crazy Mary, may infact be a personality. :/ Her niece was visiting and we talked about how fun crazy Mary is, but sometimes it goes a bit to far.  She said they have to joke about it, because its like a roller coaster.  Sounds familiar.

Anyway, Mom and her were having a big ole time in the day room when I
got there, so we stayed in the day room.
They were talking about how nice everyone is - and this black man in a
wheelchair that I had never heard say a word said "you think this
place is NICE?! "  It was all I could do to keep from falling out.

Mom told Crazy Mary that she was glad she could be there to help her
through her problems.  Crazy Mary's niece was there and said, oh me
too.  and Winked at me.

so Crazy Mary's niece was totally in on the game and is a much better
player than me.  Come to find out, Crazy Mary is a regular, and the
niece knows them all pretty well too.

It was a riot.  I cant really do it justice typing it, other than both
the niece and I encouraged them to dance later, after visitation was
over.  oy.

I talked to the social worker on my way out and she said that she had
heard from Jaquith and the paper work is at the 2nd physician (2 plus
the recommending one have to agree placement is warranted) so that
sounds promising.